Chuyện vui tiếng Anh -Phạm Đăng Phụng chọn dịch
-CNNR chọn đăng

But The French people did !

John went back to England after a short journey through France .He was the best pupil in the French class ,and the first thing his chums asked him was this :
-Did you have much trouble with your French over there ?
- Not at all, was the answer, but the French people did .

Nhưng người Pháp thì có đấy!

John trở về Anh sau một chuyến du lịch ngắn ở Pháp. Cậu giỏi nhất lớp tiếng Pháp ,nên điều đầu tiên bạn bè hỏi là :
-Ở bên ấy,mày có lúng túng với vốn tiếng Pháp của mày không?
-Còn lâu,nhưng người Pháp thì lúng túng lắm.

Confusing Chinese Names


Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?

Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!

Operator : You are talking to someone! Who is this?

Caller : I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)!
It's urgent.

Operator : I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's
this urgent matter about?

Caller : Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother
Noel Wan (no one) has involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one) got injured
and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery
Wan (everyone) is on his way to the hospital.

Operator : Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital,
then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I
don't have time for this!

Caller : You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator : I'm Saw Lee (Sorry).

Caller : Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!!

Cám ơn CNNR đã giới thiệu chuyện vui tiếng Anh đọc vui thiệt.
Cám ơn anh Tu De đã giới thiệu website www.engris.com. SL vào xem rồi cười mỉm chi hoài, đôi khi cười híp mắt nữa vì nhiều chuyện đọc xong thấy tức cuời quá xá.

Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart




You might need some humor!


One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Bob says to Mike behind him, 'My elbow hurts like the dickens!! I guess I'd better see a doctor.'

'Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money,' Mike replies.

'There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart . Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it.

It takes ten seconds and costs $10 - A lot cheaper than a doctor.'

So, Bob deposits a urine samp le in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart.

He deposits $10, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.

10 seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:
'You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and Epsom salts found on aisle 2. Avoid heavy activity. It will improve in 2 weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.'

That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Bob began wondering if the computer could be fooled.

He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sp*rm sample for good measure.

Bob hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. H e deposits $10, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.

The computer prints the following:

1. Your tap water is too ha rd.20Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm.. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer..
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better!

Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart